Yep, Life Sucks! It Really Does
Ok, I have to admit it. Life has sucked for a long time. I like to be optimistic, but I also like to call a spade a spade. So as thanksgiving approaches and I feel the ultimate dissatisfaction with my life, I wonder to my self and to God, How do I give thanks when life so wholly sucks?
I got my answer this morning as I was coming home from shopping. I got stopped for speeding. I have been meditating on truth a great deal lately, and as I sat in the car taking stock of life waiting for the police officer to bring me my ticket, I had a very clear thought of how irresponsible I am on a daily basis, because the truth is I speed all the time. I will admit that my solid extremely high functioning Subaru Outback has made me an arrogant driver. I did not want a Subaru Outback, but spirit was pretty insistent. As a result, I tend to speed. Not only do I love the feel of driving fast, I know the car can easily handle it, and that is a bad match.
Do I Really Follow the Rules – (OOPS!)
I sat on the side of the road and contemplated that arrogance and the fact that I had sped on this road just about every time I had driven it, and I deserved far more tickets than the one I got today. I sat there knowing I probably deserved a ticket for just about every time I take Monty (yes we name our cars here) out for a spin. I speed to the mall, I speed to the post office, I speed to the market, I speed to HVCC to pick my daughter up, I speed on the way to where ever I go and to be honest it was kind of in awe that I viewed my flagrant disregard for the law. Mostly because in general I believe in following the rules. Just not in my car. Oh MY!
Gratitude is an Attitude
So, I have had more bad years than good lately, and I was honestly just asking God – “Ok, God, Life has sucked for so long and I want to see it differently. How do I remain absolutely grateful in the face of such adversity?” And here is why I love God so darned much – God Answers. If we listen closely, if we pay attention, God always answers – not in the way we want, but almost always in the way we need. And I needed a reminder. I had gotten away with breaking the law so many times it was not funny and as the officer handed me that ticket (yes I was going 64 in a 45) I knew in my heart I had a great deal to be thankful for – and not just about not getting caught, how about for living through every bad decision I had ever made to speed. Yep, today I remembered gratitude is an attitude.
Ah, Let’s Remember – God Is Present
I know God holds my life. That doesn’t mean I am lucky. I am most decidedly not. But as I go through each and every adversity, asking for information, God is present. Not answering the way I want, but always answering. In a life that is difficult and taxing and sometimes purposeless, to know that I am not forgotten is alot. To be able to have gratitude for it when I feel so alone, well that is real, and that is what I asked for, and for once I got exactly what I wanted for Thanksgiving.